//give it up//

I love music.

I have it on everywhere I go. It’s on my phone. It’s on my computer. It’s on my freaking TV. It’s on in my car. It’s always on.

Have you ever had a moment where you just need something different? Funny how we find ourselves in that place every once in awhile. I found myself there last week. I was bored when I got in the car. My first thought was “Oh, I’ll just change what’s playing”. When I did, I was met with  the same boring feeling. I changed the station. I listened to sports. I listened to NPR and then quickly got depressed because the News can be depressing. I was struggling. Funny again how I didn’t automatically think “maybe I could just be alone with Jesus in my car….like I used to”.

If you know anything about my job, you know it requires a lot of driving. I drive to my kid’s house and sit and assess and work on our session for an hour and then hit that miserable part of the day where NO ONE IN OKC KNOWS HOW TO DRIVE…yes, traffic time. The farthest I drive out is to Midwest City and Norman. Not far. And usually at the times I’m going, I don’t hit any traffic *knock on wood*. Point being, I’m in my car a lot and usually singing my heart out and not always to Jesus music.

I woke up on Sunday and was so excited. Antioch OKC (my church, WHAT WHAT!) moved it’s service to Sunday morning and I was TIRED. I was happy, and excited, but man, I was tired. And I was also dreading the 7 minute drive to church. When I got to church, it was awesome. Worship was amazing. And then the message. Blake said so many things that hit me right between the eyes.

Where is your focus going? What’s on your phone, taking your focus away from what you could be doing? Are you bored with “church”? How’s your foundation? WE HAVE GOT TO GET BACK TO THE BASICS…WHERE OUR FOUNDATION IS SOUND AND FOCUS IS ON JESUS AND BEING WITH JESUS AND LETTING HIM CHANGE US…

I sat back and thought about it. I love sports (obviously), but I’m not freaking out about the Pennant or the NFL or even the NBA right now. College football gets my Saturday, sure, but it’s not something I wake up wondering about. My social media habits have dramatically changed. When I wasn’t working and was waiting on a job, I was glued to my computer. I had to know what was going on with other people who had lives while mine seemingly was stalled. I post stuff and love keeping my friends and family apprised of my life in OKC, but it’s not something I get life from. But music… 

My heart sank.

“You’re gonna ask me that aren’t You? You’re going to ask me, THIS WEEK OF ALL WEEK’S WHERE I’M DRIVING TO STROUD, OKLAHOMA, to give up music…”

“Just come back, Linds… I have something I want to do in you and you can’t be distracted… Give me 10 days…”

“But God, why does it have to be something I love so much…”

“Because you’re finding yourself in other’s songs and words rather than Mine…”

And I was done.

Like I said, I am a lover of music. It can’t be silent in my apartment. Even now as I write this, I have no music on…and it’s strange, y’all. What I realized in that moment when Blake was challenging us as a church to do was not to give everything up and be a weirdo Christian with all these rules and regulations. He was challenging us to get back to that place where it didn’t matter what show was on TV, it didn’t matter who was playing the game, it didn’t matter what new song was on the radio… all that mattered was spending time with Jesus. I don’t know about you, but I’ve never told a friend “sorry, I can’t have coffee with you. That’s my time with the Lord”. No! I am the first to admit I will freaking drop Jesus time to be with my gal pals. And I’ve realized I’ve probably placed a higher importance on my favorite music rather than spending time with the One who created that gift and gave me my voice.

So I did it. I made a decision. The next 10 days I will be listening to podcasts and sermons rather than my usual go to of secular music. I’m 3 days in and it’s a game changer. I’ve heard outstanding messages from some of my favorite pastors and teachers on confidence, boldness, and the one thing I’ve never quite wrapped my head around…FAITH. I come off like I’m the most confident and faith filled person, but that’s not me. I have no reason to doubt Jesus and his faithfulness to me, because he’s done so much, but for whatever reason, some things haven’t happened yet and I’ve basically given up on those things. But I believe getting back to the basics of simply believing like a child that God is there and is never leaving me is exactly what I need. Yes, I’m worshipping. Yes, I’m still singing in my car, but the difference is the atmosphere I’m creating again. I’m creating the exact atmosphere I believe my miracles came in. The miracles I’ve experienced came when I was worshipping. Not when I was doubting and comparing myself to others. They came when my heart was abandon to the cause and call of Jesus.

Some of y’all will probably be like “She’s nuts” and that’s ok. I’m not trying to tell everyone to look at me and all that I’m doing for the Lord. I say it because all of us have something that is clouding our view from what Jesus has for us.

So whatever it is, maybe it’s time for a change in your routine… who knows, it could be just the thing you need for a breakthrough.


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