Why Women Need Each Other…

So tonight, I was sitting in my quaint, little apartment and thinking “what should I do? Go to yoga or catch up on Netflix? Prep for tomorrow or watching the Bachelorette?”

Who wants to guess what won out?

Hint…it was not yoga 🙂

I wrote at the beginning of last year about Bachelorette. I wrote about how it’s not real, how it gives unrealistic expectations of the mechanics of relationships. I still stand by those opinions, but I have been more enamored with this season because it involves a woman who has a career. She is a DA! She is an attorney who lives in Atlanta and kicks butt for breakfast, lunch and dinner! Now, while I may think that Andi has the tendency to have a “Grumpy Cat” like facial expression, I do think it’s incredibly inspiring that a woman with a career is now ready to pursue a relationship.

Ladies, I think most times we look around us and feel we’re obviously missing something because we don’t have a boyfriend/significant other/husband to watch TV with (or insert whatever your favorite past time is). I’ve recently struggled with this very thought. Not because I feel inadequate without a man, but because I do feel like I can’t relate to the people I work with and spend most of my time with. The path I’m on is different and there’s nothing wrong with that. We need to be ok with our path. It may not bend and turn the way we want, but it always does at some point in time. I am inspired by career driven women. I decided I needed to make a list of few who inspire me most…

1. My mom… Ladies, your mother should be someone you have on this list. She makes magic happen when she has no fairy dust or energy to do it in her own strength. When she could’ve kept her job, she chose family. She chose you. I am one of those girls who wished their mom was like other moms who worked and looking back, I am thankful my mom was home. She noticed everything. She always knew when I was being bullied at school. She knew what to say when I was about to lose my mind over some brainless boy who wanted to stay my friend rather than date me. She was the one who made her family her job. And she did it willingly. Moms are the ultimate career driven women. If you don’t have a mom, look around you. Look at your friends moms. How do they make life happen everyday? How do they inspire you? Ask them to show you how you can be a great woman like her. What it comes down to ladies, is we need each other. There is a need for less mean girls and more strong, resilient, encouraging women and you should be one of them. I know that’s what I try to do.

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2. Giuliana Rancic… If you don’t know who G is, you are missing out. I have read her book How to Think Like a Guy: How to Get a Guy by Thinking Like One. I have watched every episode of Giuliana and Bill on E!. I have followed her story and liked her Facebook page and follow her on twitter. The other day, when I was having a low moment worrying about what’s next for me as I finish my Bachelor’s degree, I happened to check Twitter and saw this quote from G: “I chased my career instead of guys”. Now, for a girl like me, who wants to be married and have the dream family including soccer practices and ballet recitals, this jumped out at me. I desire a career. I want that. I want to be accomplished and get as much education as I can. I’m 27. That’s young! It’s not old! And seeing someone as successful as G say something like that, I was ready to take on the world. Find a woman like G and be encouraged. Do what you need to do to be happy and excited about life and watch the other doors in your life open wide.

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3. Hillary Clinton… “But Linds, SHE’S A DEMOCRAT!” Wait… What?? She is?? OH MY LORD. Whatever will I do?! (said like a southern belle in distress). No matter who you are, conservative or democrat, Hillary Clinton is a powerful woman. She uses her voice as a feminist, speaking for women who can’t speak for themselves. She may have different views on things, but she’s using her voice. You know, it could’ve been easy for her to fade into the wallpaper while her husband, Former President Bill Clinton, was leading our country. But she didn’t. She was an active participant in the United States. She is out spoken. She’s opinionated and doesn’t care who thinks she’s crazy. Whether you agree with me or not, Hillary is a woman to be reckoned with. Oh what I would do to have that ability… to say what I really think and feel… to stand for what I believe in and not be swayed? Man, I don’t care who you are, that’s something to be admired whether democrat or republican. Think it over.

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4. Mother Teresa… I’m sure all of us have heard of Mother Teresa. She was an amazing woman who made her life’s mission about others, especially those who could not help themselves. I was in 2nd grade when I first heard about Mother Teresa. I had to do a report on a famous person and I drew her name from a hat. I knew nothing about her, other than she was a nun. I learned that she lived a simple life, needing very little to survive. She was a prayer warrior. She was a protector of the lowly. She would often on her prayer walks stop in the alleys to check on the homeless. If she found anyone, she would take them to a shelter. She would care for them herself. I always said I would go visit India and visit where she lived. I did just that 2 years ago. She was such an inspiration to me… I cried walking through her chapel, her room, the hallways that were full of her history. I couldn’t help be admire who she was. I took a photo of 2 of her quotes. The first- “God has not called me to be successful. He’s called me to be faithful.” Second- “Intense love does not measure, it only gives”. No matter what you believe, you are called to be faithful. Be faithful in your job. Be a faithful friend. If you don’t like the word faithful, replace it with honest, or true, or unwavering. Be true to who you are and be that for someone. And secondly, love is so hard. It’s hard to be vulnerable enough to let people close and see what is really happening in our life. But, love is also the most rewarding thing in life. Love shapes you into a better human being. If you’ve been hurt by love, think of the strength you gained from that hurt. There’s a reason for everything and even though it’s hard to see right now, you went through something that will make you stronger than you were before…and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that.

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5. My mentor and her precious daughters… I wish I could tell you her name. I wish I could reveal it all about how this precious family has embraced me and has lovingly encouraged me to pursue my dreams. To my mentor, I’ve learned so much from you and family. The times I’ve sat at your kitchen bar and over enchiladas, we talked about life, work, manners, and giggled over how ridiculous life can be. The times I’ve cried in your office about what I’m supposed to be doing with my life and you lovingly told me “this is too small.. you’re thinking too small…”. In fact, in our last meeting, will go down as my favorite. As you packed up books and books and more books for me to read through, I felt powerful. I felt like I’ve always known what I’m called to and just didn’t have the guts to admit it. Thank you for allowing me to spend time with your family. Your girls are like my sisters and I don’t know what I would do without them. You, my friend, are the one that keeps me looking ahead and I can finally say I can’t wait to see what’s ahead. Here’s to us. 🙂 Girls, find someone in your life that can mentor you, that can show you through the hard stuff and help you focus on what is really and truly important. There are some things we simply can’t do on our own and we need mentors. We need someone to take us under their wing and help us on our path. It’s ok to ask for help. Do it. I promise you that it will help you in the long run.

Make a list of the women you have in your life and thank them. Send them something in the mail (yes, snail mail!) and just say how appreciative you are. Girls, we need each other. We need more happy and  encouraging women in this world. Leave someone feeling better than when you first met with them. Think of ways to brighten their day. I promise you, you won’t be disappointed.

Linds

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